H is spending three weeks with my parents in Illinois.  I miss him so much I tried to recruit his friend Nick to come over and answer my questions in monosyllabic grunts, eat all my food, and leave wet towels on the carpet.  Bring me some surly!, I begged.  No one has rolled their eyes at me in a week!   He declined as his mother was shoving him into my car.

_________________________

My dad is continuing to kick cancer ass.  He finished his six chemo treatments on June 25 and his PET scan yesterday showed continued remission.  He still has to have three weeks of five-day-a-week radiation to his ::cough:: ”groin” to ensure that the cancer cells didn’t jump over to the other side, but the doctors have assured him that it is only precautionary and shouldn’t be too bad.  “Too bad” being of course relative when you’re talking about irradiating your hooty-hoo.  Plus he can do the radiation in Marion instead of driving to STL, which is great.

_________________________

We are leaving tomorrow for A’s World Series.  This year it’s being held in lovely Broken Arrow, Oklahoma.  I know, I know, I can feel your jealousy from here.   A week in a hotel with ten 10-year-old boys in a state where they only serve 3.2 beer.  UNREFRIGERATED.  Who wants to go with?!  Line forms in front of me.

_________________________

That’s my exciting life.  Oh wait!  I ran the crafts booth at our VBS at church this week.  It was surprisingly exhausting and did not make me feel more Christ-like at all.  Which I don’t think was the point.  

We’re taking the laptop with us so I’ll be able to check in, but I probably won’t be posting.  See you on the 28th!

Here are some pictures of A in all his glory.  You might want to put on shades because the cuteness is BLINDING!

(flashing gang signs with Daddy)

I’m missing his state tournament this weekend because H (who got back from a week-long youth conference YESTERDAY) has to have his clothes washed and repacked to be ready to leave for church camp on SUNDAY.  Ugh.  This is the first time I’ve had to miss a baseball tournament in two years, but it’s all good.  Daddy and A will have some man-bonding time in West Memphis, and H and I are going to clean house, wash clothes, and go see Iron Man.  Fun, fun!

First off, let me say I’m sorry about the comments not showing up.  I THOUGHT I’d done away with moderation for comments, but they’re still going in the till.  And I’m really bad about checking because, well, they’re not supposed to be in there!  Urgh.

Back a couple of years or so ago, some blog I read referenced Free to Be. . .You & Me, which I surmised from the blog comments was some sort of revolutionary television show from the early 70s.  That puzzled me.  I was a child in the early 70s and no child in the free world watched as much TV, yet I had never heard of this show.  So I Googled it and when I read the description I knew as well as I knew my own name why this phenomenon of children’s programming was absent from my memory.

My mom wouldn’t have let this hippie crap a hundred miles from my brother and me.

Using poetry, songs, and sketches, the basic concept was to salute values such as individuality, tolerance, and happiness with one’s identity; a major thematic message is that anyone, whether a boy or a girl, can achieve anything one wants.

Hahahahahahahaaaaha!  “Individuality?”  “Tolerance?”  That’s where madness lies!!  “Achieving anything one wants?”  What?  You mean like maybe GIRLS would want to play LIttle League or boys would want to be Brownies?!  What’s next?! UNISEX BATHROOMS*, that’s what!  PEEING IN FRONT OF MEN!  (And the profits went to the Ms. Foundation?  My parents wouldn’t even let us trick-or-treat for Unicef!  I can only imagine what they would’ve said if one dime of their hard-earned money had gone to Gloria Steinem.  Good god.)

*When the ERA was being voted on, I remember my mom saying that if it passed, there’d be no more women’s and men’s restrooms. We lived in 900 sq.ft. house with one bathroom. I didn’t see the big deal.

So I’ve been feeling left out all these years.  *I* want to be free to be me!  So by the magic of YouTube, I can.  I’m so moved, I’m might cry.  Which Rosey says is okay, I’ve heard.

I just logged onto my local library to renew a book that’s due today, but that I haven’t started reading yet.   I was not allowed to renew it because it has been “requested by another patron.” 

Boo.

Then I decided to REBEL.  To flip the bird to the Man.

I am KEEPING THE BOOK UNTIL TUESDAY.  I will owe ALMOST A DOLLAR in late fees.

The adrenaline is PUMPING, people.  Tomorrow I may jaywalk.

He makes 40 look good.  Happy Birthday, Baby!

Love you!

Here in Arkansas we elect our circuit judges.  Right or wrong (I say wrong), that’s the way it is.  This year we had one judge (Family Court Judge) retire and one new judgeship given us by the legislature due to a population increase in our district.  In Family Court Judge’s position, two capable attorneys ran and the one with more name recognition won.  That’s great.  He’s a nice man and a good attorney with a lot of Family Court experience — I’m sure he’ll be fine.

The OTHER race, however, was one giant clusterf***.  The first person to announce was Hated Former Prosecutor.  HFP is the worst kind of attorney:  very arrogant and always, ALWAYS right.  No one in the legal community wants him to be judge.  NO. ONE.  So a search was made for him an opponent and Very Nice Attorney stepped up to the plate, backed by a bunch of Little Rock money (HFP has pissed off the LR defense bar something awful) and the support of most of the legal community here.  All was right with the world.

Then Other Attorney stepped in.  OA is the attorney for Child Support Enforcement (strike one).  He’s basically unknown in the district (strike two).  And he’s African-American (strike three.)  Now, I know him and he’s a great guy.  The fact that he’s African-American SHOULDN’T make any difference at all, but let’s be real.  This is Arkansas.  Small-town, rural Arkansas.  He could be the freaking’ black Oliver Wendell Holmes and he still wouldn’t win.  Right or wrong (and I say wrong), that’s the way it is.   He was never going to win, even if he’d run against HFP alone.

I told His Honor when OA entered that race that all he was going to do was take votes away from Very Nice Attorney.  And he did.  HFP and VNA are a scant 120 votes apart (VNA got more votes, so there’s that, I guess) and OA got 1000 votes.  One thousand votes that COULD have gone to VNA and this whole mess would’ve been over with today.  But nooooooo, now we have to wait until November.  Sucks to be Naderized.

1.ONE OF YOUR SCARS, HOW DID YOU GET IT?

My left arm is riddled with scars from falling into a glass storm door when I was nine.  One piece of glass as big as a man’s pinky finger was stuck in my arm, and I remember looking at it and wondering why I couldn’t feel it.  I also remember looking up at my mom in the ER and asking her why SHE was crying since I was the one who was getting stitches.   Now I know. 

2. WHAT IS ON THE WALLS IN YOUR ROOM?

Family pictures.  My grandmother told me once that you should never hang your family pictures in your living room and for some reason that has stuck with me, so I hang them in my bedroom.  (I do have family pictures in frames on table tops in the living room, though.)

3. DO YOU KNOW WHAT TIME YOU WERE BORN?

3:10 a.m.  My mom said the hospital served her the best breakfast she’d ever had about 6:00 a.m., but the anesthesia made her throw it up.  I don’t think she’s ever forgiven me for losing her blueberry buckle all over the sheets.

4. WHAT DO YOU WANT MORE THAN ANYTHING RIGHT NOW?

For my dad not to be sick.

5. WHAT DO YOU MISS? 

My boys being babies.

6. WHAT IS YOUR MOST PRIZED POSSESSION?

My wedding ring.  I dropped my ring out of my purse in the driveway and drove over it (unknowingly!).  I thought I’d lost it, so I bought a new set (gorgeous!) but then I found my poor old squished set.  I plan on getting it made into a “right-hand ring” someday (the diamonds are all still there). 

7. HOW TALL ARE YOU?

5′4″

8. DO YOU GET SCARED IN THE DAY?

Sometimes.  LIke when there are tornados. 

9. WHAT’S YOUR WORST FEAR?

Losing my kids.  Outliving my parents. 

10. WHAT KIND OF HAIR COLOR DO YOU LIKE ON THE OPPOSITE SEX?

Dark.  (Don’t tell my blonde husband!)

11. WHAT ABOUT EYE COLOR?

Doesn’t matter, but I find light-eyed African-American men especially attractive.

12. COFFEE OR ENERGY DRINK?

Coffee 

13. FAVORITE PIZZA TOPPING?

Sausage and extra-cheese (with no sauce).

14. IF YOU COULD EAT ANYTHING RIGHT NOW, WHAT WOULD IT BE?

Chocolate chip cookies with walnuts in them.

15. FAVORITE COLOR OF ALL TIME? 

I always say I don’t have a favorite color, but I own a lot of green, and there’s a lot of green in my house. 

16. HAVE YOU EVER EATEN A GOLDFISH?

A real one?  No.  Goldfish crackers?  By the thousands.

17. WHAT WAS THE FIRST MEANINGFUL GIFT YOU EVER RECEIVED?

When I was in the 8th grade, my boyfriend Curtis shoveled snow so that he could buy me a “promise ring.”  It had a little heart-shaped basket thing on it with a diamond chip nestled in it that probably only cost him $25 — which I guess is a lot of money when you’re 13.   I wore it for years, even up into college.  The band broke and one jeweler wouldn’t fix it because it had worn too thin.  I took it to another who soldered it but told me not to wear it anymore, so I put it on a chain around my neck, which I then lost one day while swimming.  I was heartbroken.

18. DO YOU HAVE A CRUSH?

I am OBSESSED with Jason Isaacs.   I don’t see how Sheila’s cousin Kerry works with him every day on Brotherhood.  I think I’d be walking around drooling like an idiot all day.

19. FAVORITE CLOTHING BRAND?

I’m partial to Liz Claiborne, mainly because she sizes big.

20. WHAT KIND OF CAR DO YOU WANT?

I’m not getting rid of the ‘Burb since it’s paid for, but I really really REEEEAALLY want a Volvo station wagon.  Like really.

21. WOULD YOU FALL IN LOVE KNOWING THAT THE PERSON IS LEAVING?

You mean leaving like dying, or leaving like going to a foreign country?  Yes, to both.

22. HAVE YOU BEEN OUT OF THE USA? 

No.

23. YOUR WEAKNESSES?

I’m quite judgy.  And a little lazy.

25. FIRST JOB?

I was a nanny for a 12-year-old boy one summer when I was home from college.  I got fired when he burned down the barn while I was sleeping off a hangover.

26. EVER DONE A PRANK CALL?

Yes.  We used to order stuff COD and send it to our most-hated teachers.

27. DO YOU THINK EVERYONE OUT THERE HAS A SOUL MATE?

I didn’t.

28. WHAT WERE YOU DOING BEFORE YOU FILLED THIS OUT? 

Trying to log into WordPress.  It always kicks me out and then I have to try and remember my password.

29. HAVE YOU EVER HAD SURGERY?

Yes.  A tonsillectomy, a breast reduction, and a c-section.

30. WHAT DO YOU GET COMPLIMENTED ABOUT MOST? 

My sense of humor. 

31. WHAT DO YOU WANT FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY?

Money.

32. HOW MANY KIDS DO YOU WANT?

Two.  Hey!  Got my wish! 

33. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?

My mom couldn’t decide on a first name (my middle name, Christine, was after her favorite aunt) but they wouldn’t let me leave the hospital unnamed.  My grandmother was watching As The World Turns and suggested “Lisa” and my mom said, “OK.”  Thanks for putting so much thought into it, Mom.  You named me after the show slut.

34. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST TURN OFF WITH THE OPPOSITE SEX? 

Know-it-all-ness.  And bad personal hygiene. 

35. WHAT IS ONE THING YOU MISS ABOUT GRADE SCHOOL? 

Grilled cheese.

36. WHAT KIND OF SHAMPOO DO YOU USE?

Right now I’m using Pro Vive “Glossy Volume.”  It does neither.

38. ANY BAD HABITS?

I can’t keep my fingers out of my mouth.  And I’m constantly fidgeting with my hair or clothes.

39. ARE YOU A JEALOUS PERSON?

Sometimes.

40. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?

I think so.  You’re all friends with me, right?  I can’t be too bad.

41. DO YOU AGREE WITH FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS?

Only if your friend is Jason Isaacs.

42. HOW DO YOU RELEASE ANGER?

Blistering sarcasm.

43. WHAT’S YOUR MAIN GOAL IN LIFE?

Raising good men.  There’s a saying that says a good man is God’s hands on earth, and I truly believe that.

44. WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE TOY AS A CHILD?

The LIte-Brite I never got.

45. HOW MANY NUMBERS ARE IN YOUR CELL PHONE? 

20-30. 

46. WERE YOU A FAN OF BARNEY AS A LITTLE KID?

Who wrote this meme?  A 18-year-old? 

47. MASHED POTATOES OR MACARONI AND CHEESE?

Is my mom cooking?  Because her mac-n-cheese will make you slap your neighbor.  But other than that, mashed taters.

48. DO YOU HAVE ALL YOUR FINGERS AND TOES?

Um, YEAH.

49. DO YOU HAVE A COMPUTER IN YOUR ROOM?

No, and neither do my kids.

50. PLANS FOR TONIGHT?

Other than laundry left over from yesterday (yes, I spent my Mother’s Day doing laundry), nothing.

51. WHAT’S THE FASTEST YOU’VE EVER GONE IN A CAR?

85.

52. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO? 

“Blurry” by Puddle of Mudd.

53. LAST THING YOU DRANK?

A cup of black coffee.

54. REPUBLICAN OR DEMOCRAT?

I’m a registered Republican, but I vote for the best person for the job regardless of party.

55. DO YOU HAVE A LOW SELF ESTEEM OR A HIGH SELF ESTEEM?

Shorty got low low low low low.

56. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING?

This one.

Wednesday’s PET scan (the first after starting chemo) showed TOTAL REMISSION!  Boo-effing-yah!

He still has to complete the chemo regimen, which is three more treatments in the STL, but he is totally kicking lymphoma’s ASS.

Woot!

This?  Followed me home last night from the Travelers game.  I made the comment to A that “hey, the rain stopped” without thinking, “Because that’s what happens when a TORNADO comes, duh.”   When I got home, my MIL called and said, “It hit the Buick dealership!”  The Buick dealership I had just passed TWO MINUTES before.

Yeeaah.  

I’ve been dealing with phone calls from relatives all morning (All is fine, just shaken up.  And our driveway is filled with insulation from g-d knows where.) and I had to cancel a hearing scheduled for this afternoon because we are completely cut-off from Little Rock due to water over the interstate.  Good times.

We’re lucky and blessed.  Some are not.  Please keep those people in your prayers.

We were lucky enough to attend the Miami/St. Mary’s game last weekend at Alltel Arena (we sold our other tickets to Memphis fans) and I managed to get some photos of, um, important stuff:

Oh, you want closer?  Okay.

I’ll even throw in their mascot for good measure.  (Seriously, a duck?  That reps the HURRICANE?  Don’t ducks get their asses kicked by hurricanes?  Makes no sense.)

And under the guise of the fairness doctrine:  Here’s a pic of the St. Mary’s fan session.  I thought they had a good-sized crowd considering they came more than halfway across the country.  (The people in striped rugby shirts spelled out “Go Gaels SMC.”) Very cool.

Sorry, Texas fans.  The boys got bored and we left before that game started.  I hear  Rick Barnes had to have a police escort to, from, and during the game.  You stay classy, Austin!